How to Deal with Trust Issues

Trust is one of the main foundations of a healthy relationship, with yourself and others. But sometimes we trust the wrong people and get hurt by people’s actions.

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This usually leads to Trust Issues in relationships with other people. We can’t trust others easily, we become more suspicious of people’s intentions and actions behind our backs.

Photo by bruce mars on Unsplash

Signs of trust issues include:

  • 1. You Focus on the Negative
  • 2. You Feel Like You Have to Do Everything
  • 3. Being Suspicious of Friends & Family
  • 4. Avoiding Intimacy
  • 5. Holding Grudges
  • 6. You Pick Fights
  • 7. You Keep to Yourself
  • 8. You Avoid Commitment
  • 9. You Spy on People or Check Their Phones
  • 10. You Are a Loner
  • 11. You Find Yourself in Relationships With Untrustworthy People
  • 12. You Smother People You Care About
  • 13. Fear of Abandonment
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Past hurt and mistakes are a way to teach us lessons the hard way. But we don’t have to keep holding on to past traumas and bad experiences.

Photo by Marek Piwnicki on Unsplash

So here’s a way to deal with your trust issues and heal yourself from old experiences.

  • Take safe emotional risks: Allow yourself to practice trusting in small, safe ways. Take someone at their word. Give them the benefit of the doubt.
  • Allow yourself time: If your trust has been broken, it’s going to take some time without further betrayal for the person to earn it back.
  • Avoid the temptation to snoop or spy: Snooping or spying can easily become an obsessive behavior that will only make your trust issues worse.
  • Take your time getting to know new people: Don’t jump into trusting people before you know them. Many people with trust issues tend to trust too quickly, keeping you stuck in the pattern.
  • Communicate with your partner: Be careful not to accuse or blame. Instead, communicate clearly how you are feeling and what you need. For example, “When you came home late, I felt worried and insecure. I need you to give me a call next time.”
  • Self-reflect: Spend some time thinking, journaling or talking to a friend about this pattern in your life and what is within your power to change.
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