Author: Joe Assaad

When things break and end, it’s always hard to move forward and past this feeling of loss, but there’s an important process that helps us cope with the situation and move past it which is closure. In this article we’ll discuss the importance of closure in situations that ended suddenly or ones that seem hard to move past.

So what does closure mean?

Getting emotional closure means that you can “close the book” on your situation and its associated pain and start working on moving past this painful situation. It helps you learn the lesson, heal fast and let go.

So how do we get it?

There are different ways for closure, and each individual has their own way of coping. But here’s some of the ways that you can do to get the needed closure and move on with your life.

1. Take full responsibility for yourself.
It’s ultimately up to you to take the necessary actions to help move you forward. Have conversations with yourself, both asking and answering your own questions in a form of a “self-dialogue.”

Being as honest as you can be will pay off in the long run. The pain, hurt, anger, and disappointment will diminish once you’ve cleared the way to a better, more realistic understanding of the situation.

2. Grieve the loss.
Take plenty of time to do this. There is no set amount of time and no prescribed way; it’s totally up to each person to find that for themselves.

3. Gather your strengths.

• Focus on the positives. Make a list of your talents, gifts, and assets.
• Surround yourself with people who know you well, encourage and support you.
• Shift the emphasis to what you need, what makes you happy. Don’t worry about pleasing others.
• Assess where you can make positive change in your life.
• Define and affirm what you’re able to do something about now.

4. Make a plan for the immediate future.
Determine what’s most important for you moving forward. If necessary, reorder your priorities to allow you to explore different possibilities and opportunities that may present themselves to you.

5. Create a ritual.
Believe it or not, performing a ritual is a powerful tool to help gain closure.

For example, when a relationship is over, what do you do with all of the meaningful items and objects, such as letters, pictures, etc., that were part of the relationship? A “fire ceremony” is a way to consume the past, but any number of rituals that you personally create can provide symbolic finality and closure.

So in the end closure comes from within and not necessary from others. Grief, cry, and enable yourself to feel all your emotions of sadness and loss, but make sure to always re-climb your state to the happy version at all time.

for the full article visit Psychology today.